WHAT YOUR TOILET PAPER SAYS ABOUT YOU
1-PLY
You are a no-nonsense type who ranks value over creature comforts. You like to be free to use as many squares as you like without worrying about wasting money. To those who find 1-ply ‘rough’ you say “who are you, the Queen of England?” When camping any plant leaf or small branch (!) will work just fine for you. Plus you don’t mind getting your hands dirty.
2-PLY
Cost vs. comfort. You struggle with this balance. You may be in your teens or twenties and would rather spend discretionary income elsewhere. Yet you plan to spring for at least 3-ply once you ‘get established’. Plus your plumbing may be temperamental – 2-ply dissolves easily.
3-PLY
You don’t consider 3-ply a splurge, because it’s what your rear end deserves. Plus you might be a germophobe. Cleanliness (of rear, of hands) is a priority and you needs strong squares to make sure that happens.
GREEN (made from Recycled paper)
So eco-friendly! So thoughtful. You are willing to sacrifice some comfort in order to feel like your making a difference to the environment. Yes, you enjoy using the ‘corporate stuff’ at your friends houses or nice restaurants, who wouldn’t? But for your house, it’s green or die.
Quilted, Perfumed, Colored and/or Medicated
Fancy! Your rear end may be fragile? But nothing is too good for it. You want the cream of the crop, whether it’s TP, a heated toilet seat or an attendant handing you a hand towel. You use as many squares as you feel like, with no guilt.
